Sunday, December 17, 2006

To my very favorite Friends

To my very favorite guys and gals in the whole
world...!! Happy Holidays!


If I were ol' Santa, you know what I'd do;
I'd dump silly gifts that are given to you,
and deliver some things just inside your front door,
things you have lost, but treasured before.

I'd give you back all your maidenly vigor, and to go
along with it, a neat tiny figure. Then restore the old color that once
graced your hair, before rinses and bleaches took residence there.
I'd bring back the shape with which you were gifted, so
things now suspended need not be uplifted. I'd draw in your tummy
and smooth down your back until you'd be a dream in those tight fitting
slacks.

I'd remove all your wrinkles and leave only one chin, so
you wouldn't spend hours rubbing grease on your skin. You'd never have
flashes or queer dizzy spells and you wouldn't hear noises like
ringing of bells.

No sore aching feet and no corns on your toes; no
searching for spectacles when they're right on your nose. Not a shot would you
take in your arm, hip or fanny from a doctor who thinks you're a nervous
old granny.

You'd never have a headache, so no pills would you take
and no heating pad needed since your muscles won't ache. Yes, if I were
Santa, you'd never look stupid. You'd be a cute little chick with
the romance of cupid.
I'd give a lift to your heart when those wolves start to
whistle and the joys of your heart would be light as a thistle.

But alas! I'm not Santa. I'm simply just me; the
matronliest of matrons you ever did see.

I wish I could tell you all the symptoms I've got,
but I'm due at my doctor's for an estrogen shot.
Even though we've grown older this wish is sincere;

Merry Christmas to you and a Happy New Year.

Thanks Barb H.

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