Saturday, July 21, 2007

LAWS

Law of Mechanical RepairAfter your hands become coated with grease,Your nose will begin to itch or you'll have to pee.

Law of the WorkshopAny tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

Law of ProbabilityThe probability of being watched is directly proportional to theStupidity of your act.

Law of the TelephoneIf you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.

Law of the AlibiIf you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire,The very next morning you will have a flat tire.

Variation LawIf you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will startTo move faster than the one you are in now (works every time).

Law of the BathWhen the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.

Law of Close EncountersThe probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically
when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

Law of the ResultWhen you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.

Law of BiomechanicsThe severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

Law of the TheaterAt any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.

Law of CoffeeAs soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your bossWill ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

Murphy's Law of LockersIf there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

Law of Rugs/CarpetsThe chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor covering
are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug.

Law of LocationNo matter where you go, there you are.

Law of Logical ArgumentAnything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.

Brown's LawIf the shoe fits, it's ugly.

Oliver's LawA closed mouth gathers no feet.

Wilson's Law (this one is true every time!)As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.

Doctors' LawIf you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor,By the time you get there you'll feel better. Don't make an appointment and you'll stay sick

Thanks Ellen S.

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