Subject: My childs an honor student....>Dear Dad:
It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my newgirlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mum and you.
I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice. But I knew you would not approve of herbecause of all her piercings, tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than Iam.
But it's not only the passion...Dad she's pregnant.
Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in thewoods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream ofhaving many more children.
Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't reallyhurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that livenearby for cocaine and ecstasy.
In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDSso Stacy can get better. She deserves it.
Don't worry Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care ofmyself. Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know yourgrandchildren.
Your Son JohnPS. Dad, none of the above is true.
I'm over at Tommy's house. I just wantedto remind you that there are worse things in life than the report card that's in my deskdrawer.
I love you.
Call me when it's safe to come home.
Thanks Ivan R.