Monday, October 29, 2007

Morning Funny

Here's a few cute ones I'm passing on


ROMANCE MATHEMATICS
Smart man + smart woman = romanceSmart
man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
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OFFICE ARITHMETICS
mart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime
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SHOPPING MATh
A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs.
A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn't need.
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GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

_____________________________
HAPPINESS
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

______________________________

LONGEVITY
Married men live longer than single men do,but married men are a lot more willing to die.______________________________

PROPENSITY TO CHANGE

A woman marries a man expecting he will change,but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change,and she does.

_____________________________
DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE

A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
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HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, pokingme in the ribs and cackling, telling me, 'You're next.'

They stopped after I started doing the same thingto them at funerals.

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SEND THIS TO A SMART WOMAN WHO NEEDS A LAUGH

AND TO THE SMART GUYS YOU KNOW CAN HANDLE IT

Thanks Bob A.

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