Monday, April 21, 2008

Pfunnies

1.  Energizer Bunny Arrested & Charged with Battery

 2. A  pessimist's blood type is always b-negative

 3.  Practice safe eating -- always use  condiments.

 4. A  Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your  mother.

5.  Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.

 6.  Marriage is the mourning after the knot  before.

 7. A  hangover is the wrath of grapes.

 8.  Corduroy pillows are making headlines.

 9. Is a  book on voyeurism a peeping tome?

10. Does  the name Pavlov ring a bell?

 11. A  successful diet is the triumph of mind over  platter.

 12. Time  flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a  banana.

 13. A  gossip is someone with a great sense of  rumor.

14.  Without geometry, life is pointless.

 15. A  man's home is his castle, in a manor of  speaking.

 16. When  two egotists meet, it's an I for an I.

 17. A  bicycle can't stand on its own because it is  two-tired.

 18.  What's the definition of a will? (Come on, it's a dead  giveaway!)

19. A  backwards poet writes inverse.

 20. A  chicken crossing the road is poultry in  motion.

 21. If  you don't pay your exorcist, you get  repossessed.

 22. With  her marriage, she got a new name and a  dress.

 23. When  a clock is hungry, it goes back four  seconds.

 24. The  man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully  recovered.

 25. A  grenade in a French kitchen results in Linoleum  Blownapart.

 26. A lot  of money is tainted. T'aint yours, and t'aint  mine.

 27. A  boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.

 28. He  had a photographic memory that was never  developed.

29. A  short fortune-teller escaped from prison is a small  medium-at-large.

30. Once  you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a  mall.

31.  People who jump off a Parisbridge  are in Seine.

32. An  actress who saw her first strands of grey hair thought she'd  dye.

33.  Acupuncture is a jab well done.

34. Frog  slogan: Time's fun when you're having  flies.

 

Thanks Bob A.

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