Monday, December 08, 2008

The Over Thirty Crowd

When I grew up,

There was no way in hell I was going to lay

 

A bunch of crap like that on kids about how hard I had it

 

And how easy they've got it!

 

But now that... I'm over the ripe old age of

Thirty, I can't help but look around and notice the youth of today.

 

You've got it so easy! I mean, compared to my

Childhood, you live in a damn Utopia!

 

And I hate to say it but you kids today you

Don't know how good you've got it!

 

I mean, when I was a kid we didn't have The Internet. If we wanted to know something, We had to go to the damn library and

Look it up ourselves, in the card catalogue!!

 

There was no email!! We had to actually write

Somebody a letter, with a pen!

 

...Then you had to walk all the way across the street and put it in the mailbox and it would take like a week to get there!

 

There were no MP3's or Napsters! You wanted to

Steal music, you had to hitchhike to the damn record store and shoplift it yourself!

 

Or you had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the DJ'd usually talk over the beginning and @#*% it all up!

 

We didn't have fancy crap like Call Waiting! If you

Were on the phone and somebody else called they got a busy signal, that's it!

 

And we didn't have fancy Caller ID either!

When the phone rang, you had no idea who it was! It could be your school,

Your mom, your boss, your Bookie, your drug dealer, a collections agent, you

Just didn't know!!! You had to pick it up and take your chances, mister!

 

We didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation video

Games with high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had the Atari 2600! With games

Like 'Space Invaders' and 'asteroids'. Your guy was a little square! You

Actually had to use your Imagination!! And there were no multiple levels or

Screens, it was just one screen

Forever!

 

And you could never win. The game just kept getting

Harder and harder and

Faster and faster until you died! Just like LIFE!

 

Sure, we had cable television, but back then that

Was only m-net And there was no on screen menu and no remote

Control!

 

You had to use a Little book called a TV Guide to find out what was

On! You were screwed when it Came to channel surfing! You had to get off

Your ass and walk over to the TV to change the Channel and there was no

Cartoon Network either! You could only get cartoons

On Saturday Morning. Do you Hear what I'm saying!?! We had to wait ALL WEEK

For cartoons, you spoiled

Little rat-bastards!

 

And we didn't have microwaves, if we wanted to heat

Something up we had to use the stove ... Imagine that!

 

If we wanted Popcorn, we had to use that stupid Jiffy Pop thing

And shake it over the stove forever like an idiot.

 

That's exactly what I'm talking about! You kids

Today have got it too easy.

You're spoiled. You guys wouldn't have lasted

Five minutes back in 1980!

 

Regards,

The over 30 Crowd

 

(Send this to someone you'd like to make smile,

Whether they are under 30 or not.

 

Thanks Bob A.

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