Monday, January 12, 2009


Ok Ladies and Gentlemen with the exception of My Daughter Kirstin who will

eventually get there.


Ok you Boomers Read and Pay attention. Please try not to Laugh to hard.


James Bird(The Instigator)

> Questions and Answers from an CARP Forum


>              Q: Where can men over the age of 60 find

> younger, sexy women who are interested in them?

>              A: Try a bookstore under fiction.


>              Q: What can a man do while his wife is going

> through menopause?

>              A: Keep busy.. If you're handy with tools,

> you can finish the basement.  When you are done you will

> have a place to live.


>              Q:  Someone has told  me that menopause is

> mentioned in the Bible. Is that true? Where can it be

> found?

>              A: Yes. Matthew 14:92: 'And Mary rode

> Joseph's ass all the way to Egypt .'


>              Q: How can you increase the heart rate of

> your 60+ year old husband?

>              A: Tell him you're pregnant.


>              Q: How can you avoid that terrible curse of

> the elderly wrinkles?

>              A: Take off your glasses.


>              Q: Seriously! What can I do for these

> crow's feet and all those wrinkles on my face?

>              A: Go braless. It will usually pull them out.


>              Q: Why should 60+ year old people use valet

> parking?

>              A: Valets don't forget where they park

> your car.


>              Q: Is it common for 60+ year olds to have

> problems with short term memory storage?

>              A: Storing memory is not a problem, retrieving

> it is a problem.


>              Q: As people age, do they sleep more soundly?

>              A: Yes, but usually in the afternoon.


>              Q: Where should 60+ year olds look for eye

> glasses?

>              A: On their foreheads.


>              Q: What is the most common remark made by 60+

> year olds when they enter antique stores?

>              A: "Gosh, I remember these."

>Thanks Jim B.

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