Friday, June 26, 2009

Rodney Remembered

HELLOOOOO,,,HELLOOOO !!!

JUST TAKE A LITTLE BREAK,,,,,AND USE YOUR IMAGINATION,,,JUST A LITTLE ,,,

IF YOU SAY TO YOURSELF,,,,,JUST BEFORE YOU READ EACH LINE,,,,,"I GET NO

RESPECT !!!"

YOU CAN ALMOST HEAR HIS VOICE !!! CHEERS RODNEY !!! WE REMEMBER !!

JOHN,,,

We miss Rodney Dangerfield because he said:

My wife only has sex with me for a purpose. Last night she used me to time

an egg.

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won

t drink from my glass!

Last night my wife met me at the front door.. She was wearing a sexy

negligee. The only trouble was, she was coming home.

A girl phoned me and said, 'Come on over. There's nobody home.' I went over.

Nobody was home!

A hooker once told me she had a headache.

I went to a massage parlor. It was self-service.

If it weren't for pickpockets, I'd have no sex life at all.

I was making love to this girl and she started crying. I said, 'Are you

going to hate yourself in the morning?' She said, 'No, I hate myself now.'

I knew a girl so ugly... they used her in prisons to cure sex offenders.

My wife is such a bad cook, if we leave dental floss in the kitchen the

roaches hang themselves.

I'm so ugly I stuck my head out the window and got arrested for mooning.

The other day I came home and a guy was jogging, naked. I asked him, 'Why?'

He said, 'Because you came home early.'

My wife's such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer.

I know I'm not sexy. When I put my underwear on I can hear the

Fruit-of-the-Loom guys giggling.

My wife is such a bad cook, in my house we pray after the meal.

My wife likes to talk on the phone during sex; she called me from Chicago

last night.

LAST ONE:

My family was so poor that if I hadn't been born a boy, I wouldn't have had

anything to play with.

Thanks John G.

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