Newfoundland Medical Dictionary

Artery......................... The study of paintings

Bacteria....................... Back door to cafeteria

Barium........................ What doctors do when patients die

Benign........................ What you be, after you be eight

Caesarean Section........ A neighborhood in Rome

Cat scan.......................Searching for Kitty

Cauterize......................Made eye contact with her

Colic.......................... A sheep dog

Coma........................... A punctuation mark

Dilate......................... To live long

Enema..........................Not a friend

Fester......................... Quicker than someone else

Fibula......................... A small lie

Impotent....................... Distinguished, well known

Labor Pain................... Getting hurt at work

Medical Staff................. A Doctor's cane

Morbid......................... A higher offer

Nitrates....................... Cheaper than day rates

Node........................... I knew it

Outpatient.....................A person who has fainted

Pelvis......................... Second cousin to Elvis

Post Operative............ A letter carrier

Recovery Room.......... Place to do upholstery

Rectum.........................Nearly killed him

Secretion...................... Hiding something

Seizure........................ Roman emperor

Tablet......................... A small table

Terminal Illness............ Getting sick at the airport

Tumor........................ One plus one more

Urine.......................... Opposite of you're out

Thanks Barry & Louise D.