These are groaners……………
Some of these you may have had, in the form here, or some other;
whatever, they are all darned good!
1. The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was --
SirCumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.
2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island -- but it
turned out to be an optical Aleutian.
3. She was only a whisky maker -- but he loved her
4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class --
because it was a weapon of math disruption.
5. The butcher backed into the meat grinder -- and got a little
behind in his work.
6. No matter how much you push the envelope
-- it'll still be stationery.
7. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road -- and was cited for
8. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France -- would result in Linoleum
9. Two silk worms had a race -- they ended up in a
10. Time flies like an arrow -- fruit flies like a
11. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall -- the police are
looking into it.
12. Atheism -- is a non-prophet
13. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. -- One hat
said to the other, 'You stay here, I'll go on a head.'
14. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger -- then, it hit
15. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab centre said -- 'Keep off the
16. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital --
his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was. The nurse said, 'No change
17. A chicken crossing the road -- is poultry in
18. The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison -- was a small
medium at large.
19. The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray -- is now a
20. A backward poet -- writes inverse.
21. In democracy, it's your vote that counts -- in feudalism, it's
your count that votes.
22. When cannibals ate a missionary -- they got a taste of
23. Don't join dangerous cults -- practice safe sects!
Thanks Barry & Louise D.